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Tough love and a fresh perspective

If you could get one tip, one piece of advice, that one small thing that makes a change, moves the needle, or helps you gain clarity, it was all worth it.

We were sitting on the edge of the cliff and the view was amazing, breathtaking. The combination of sun and wind on my face reminded me why getting out of the city is so important. Looking at the mountains before us, I told my friend I felt tired. I was exhausted from the urban race, running my company and the day in, day out hustle and grind from dusk till dawn – literally working my life away.

He looked at me and smiled. He had just turned 62 and had a successful consulting business helping CEOs of major companies improve the way they run their businesses, teams and how they make decisions.

And me? I was in my mid 30’s working hard at my digital marketing agency and feeling tired. It felt as if he was over those mountains and I hadn’t even begun the journey to cross them.

He smiled and said, “Can I tell you something?”

“Sure,” I replied eager to hear what he had to say.

“Can I give you what we call tough love? I will tell you the brutal truth, the way I see things but remember I’m saying this because I care and have your best interests at heart.”

“Please do. I won’t get offended or anything.”

I was certain he was about to share the secret to success – that trick we all hear about on social media, that one hack to rule them all. My eyes opened up, my ears attentive to his every breath, as the very next might carry a genius tip. He looked at the stone in his hand, passed his thumb over it and threw it far away. Then he looked at me and said in his assertive and soothing voice: “You’re too fat. You need to lose weight.”

Not sure what I had just heard, I decided to wait a moment before I spoke, absorbing this Mr. Miagi, karate kid, ‘wax on, wax off’ concept. What is this mind trick?

Well, I had been eating quite badly in the few months prior, and I was barely sleeping 4 hours each night. The most sporty thing I had done recently was to hold a pint of beer for a few hours at the local bar. Damn. I’m fat huh?

He stood up, reached out his hand to help me up and hugged me. I couldn’t believe it, one act of tough love, one sentence – what an impact.

All I needed was an outside perspective, someone telling me how they see things. But, one might ask, how is that connected to my business?

Sometimes we need to get that one tip, one piece of advice, that one small thing that makes a change, moves the needle, or helps you gain clarity, it was all worth it.

For me that resulted in leaving work every day at 6:30p.m. and going for a walk. Eventually this turned into a run, which then led to a change in my eating and sleeping habits, less beer drinking and being more positive in general. Setting a work schedule meant I needed to be more productive, choose what’s really important and focus more. These activities resulted in my business doubling over the following 12 months.

We all need a fresh perspective, sometimes from someone we do not know or who has a completely different background.

When you feel it’s time to make a change in your business, reach out. I will listen and see if I can share my experiences in marketing, sales and branding to help you improve your business or mindset. I promise to give you tough love when necessary and if you start exercising or changing the way you do things, I will know I have chosen my profession and passion well.

 

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Why reading that one book changed my life forever

 

We never know where we might end up, where our stories might lead. For me, it was about writing and telling the stories that define us.

When I was 20 or so, serving in the Israeli military up north, on the Israel-Lebanon border, we had time – free time, or at least it felt like free time.

I was mainly doing night shifts from 10p.m. to 6a.m. knowing the other side would try and hit our bases at dawn. It was a strange ritual for everyone involved. And, as you do, I started forming my own habits around this daily routine. I would read at night, and at around 5a.m. I would make coffee, clean the desk and check the radio was working so I could hear the first shouts when all hell broke loose.

But, interestingly enough, what I remember most from this time is how the books I read made me feel. They were my escape from the day-to-day army life of shooting and danger. I devoured stories about far away places or the nightlife scene in some city I wanted to visit or crime-solving mysteries and I just could not stop reading.

Then someone (I can’t really remember who she was now) told me about this one funny book written by a young author about dating and Tel-Aviv, the city I was born and raised in. It probably took me 2 shifts to finish the book and I said to myself, is that it? That’s a book? I knew then and there that I could write a book, a novel. All I would need is time.

I was 20, mind you and it took me another decade to find the time to write my first novel. It was a great experience. Well, that’s not exactly true. But you know how it is, time passes and we remember things differently, in this case more positively. It took me about 14 months to write and self-publish my first novel (the second one took more than double that amount of time).

I started to write long essays sometime in the 4th grade when my teacher Deborah told my parents I should write more, as I was very imaginative. I like to attribute this imagination to bad 80’s TV shows, Dungeons & Dragons, computer games and the Neverending story. It was never about me, but rather taking people on a journey just by using words, making them feel good, laugh and being able to control that entire emotional rollercoaster. I loved it.

Over the years, I learned much more about the power of the written word. When I worked as a marketing manager and later brand manager, I sold snowboard gear using only words to describe the feeling one might have if they were to buy a specific board or boots. Increasing my language skills through sales, meeting hundreds of clients every month and improving my technique, all made me better at storytelling.

 

Writing a book is never easy. Telling a story sounds easy but telling a good one takes practice. We had countless funny moments in the army and whenever I reunite with my former comrades, we still tell those same stories. They have evolved into something completely different than what actually happened over there, but when we get the chance to tell them to a new audience we spice it up – a good opening, a solid punchline, you know, the juicy stuff. These little anecdotes have changed and morphed into well-crafted stories.

And the book about dating in Tel Aviv? I loved that book. Many years later I even met the author and joined his masterclass. I remember one night after class, we sat outside on the sidewalk downtown having a smoke and he told me he loved my short stories and I should publish a book. I smiled, gave him a copy of my novel and said thank you for the inspiration all those years ago.

It would take about 20 years from that night, reading that book to finding my passion, to make storytelling with my main business. It is ok if you still have no clue what your story is or how to tell it, but I offer you this one piece of advice: write. Once a day or on the weekends, just write online or in a notebook. It could be your thoughts, dreams or hopes. Why? Because writing makes it real – because it’s yours, and who knows what treasures you might find.

None of us know where our story might take us, but it is our story to tell, our journey to enjoy and grow from. Your story is your passion. Just make sure not to waste it.

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Let’s write a new story together

We’ve all got stories to tell. Now I’m telling my own, and I hope you are as well.

Starting over is never easy but what if rather than a failure, we looked at it as starting something new or taking what we have to the next level?

I have always loved stories. When I was a little kid I was fascinated by Robinson Crusoe and Gulliver’s travels. I would spend hours in front of the TV staring at shows when I could barely understand English. As I grew up, my dad purchased one of the first Atari computers in my neighborhood and later we got a PC, a true wonder in the early 80’s.

I fell in love with quests – those long games where you had to solve a variety of problems, whether in a king’s court, as a cop, or maybe as some dubious character (Leisure suit Larry for those who recall). I loved playing, and using my imagination to come up with creative ideas.

For me, it has always been about telling stories. For over a decade, I have been telling other people’s stories. Now, I think I want to keep that going, but also start sharing more of my own stories, which is why I’m here, now, writing to you. It is 6:30am and it feels like I just need to start.

During the quarantine in March and April, I had a lot of time to think and be reminded of all the things I love about my work: meeting new people, writing, selling, crafting marketing ideas, and bringing them all to life. But quarantine also reminded me of how much I love doing these things by myself, or for myself if you will, and I always promised myself that one day I would. You know how it is, to make something happen, you just need to start somewhere.

For me, the start was building this new website, but that’s just the first step. You see, in 2007, while I was working on launching an extreme sports website I built with a friend, it occurred to me I had a lot to say and teach about marketing. So, I decided I should write a book about it. I called it: In-Depth Marketing in a Nutshell.

And I wrote my heart out. I wrote for days only to discover that I had not said anything new. Although I was an excellent salesman and had great success as a marketing and brand manager, I was lacking new concepts. I did not say anything you have not heard a million times and even the way I told those ideas was mundane, just like any other marketing book. I decided I needed to perfect my craft before I could write this book. It is 2020 and now I know I have something totally unique.

My methodology, now called the Business Catcher, has helped countless companies over the past 10 years and my newly-launched workshop is following in its footsteps; I couldn’t be happier. 

This pandemic might go away or it might last, but I decided I want to make the best of it. I want to keep telling my story and the stories of others, taking a leap and doing what I love. Consulting and teaching have always been part of my work, but my company, Streetwise, and the great team there, has been there as my shield. Now, I am taking a step forward and putting myself center stage, exposed, ready to do whatever it takes to share my stories and make them matter.

I thought this would be a good first major post for my new website. Putting my thoughts and feelings out there is a major step for me as we are used to being “happy happy joy joy” on social media, but that is not how all stories go.

I’m not changing my profession, I’m just changing the way I talk about it. The business model is changing to include more consulting, new workshops and lectures and my soon-to-be-launched Patreon page (I will probably write more about this soon – a whole different story).

We never really start over. We pack our shit, put it in a plastic bag, a suitcase, or maybe a car, (if you lived enough you might need a van) and we go.

For me, this simply means taking my story to another website. 

 

If you read this, I hope you are also telling your story in your way. I hope you find something interesting here and decide to stay. I hope.

For me, this is the next step, not a do over. For me, launching this site has been a long time coming and I can’t wait to meet everyone on the planet and try to do as much good as I can.

I know, it’s not possible to meet everyone, and no one can ever do only good. Hey, some people might hate you but you have to try. You have to set some goals higher than what you are used to. Well, that is my welcome post and a piece of my story.

Now, go write yours.

Nir